But the moment .I got home I just felt the extreme need to pray. Like God was calling me to say “You’ve been telling everyone else they need to come to me, but now I want you to do it. You’ve been asking be blessed, but you’ve been asking me for a cup, not the ocean of love and blessings I have in store for you.” I just feel the tears coming and tomorrow I’m going to spend the time talking to Him. I have an emptiness within me, and it can’t be filled with friends, nor can it be field with alcohol, men, or celebrity. I just need to pray.
I’ve come to the realization that I might be ready to date again. However, Danielle says I’m not. I’m more stable than she is, but I think the only reason she’s saying I shouldn’t date is so she isn’t alone when her significant other bothers her. I made a promise that I wouldn’t sleep with anyone until it was right, or date until I wasn’t bitter, and that’s been since May. She wouldn’t be though. No man will ever have all of my attention the way David did. I’ve learned to be selfish with my love and time, unlike before. No one will ever take all of me the way he did. Maybe that’s why another friend said I was hardened unlike before. It’s unfortunate, but the next guy will have a hell of a lot of work to do before I truly love him.